My Happy Ever After

      It's always bugged me when people say "mom and baby are doing great" after a birth announcement. You know even if that mom had a great labor and delivery she's in a good amount of pain. That's not "doing great", can't we be honest and say mom is managing the pain __? Or even saying mom and baby are healthy, prayers appreciated for mom's pain.      To be physically attached to your baby for the better part of a year and then abruptly separated is hard. I know others handle it better than I do, I struggle to have the baby anywhere but in my arms. My heart aches when she's not with me, it makes sharing her with family really difficult. The first time Tim took her downstairs while I sat in the bed felt like he took her across state lines without me. Maybe I'm a little crazy but these are honest emotions I'm working through. Elyanna's whole kindergarten year I struggled with that heartache every time I dropped her off at school. ...

I was told 4 th babies come quick. I prayed for a quick, easy delivery. I envisioned every step of what it could look like, all the possibilities, I visualized pushing my baby out in many different scenarios and what that would be like emotionally. I enjoyed every wiggle and hiccup, I thanked God for my body that sustained healthy babies to term and beyond. I never got impatient to get her out. I was anxious, so so anxious. I prayed and meditated on Gods word, I received prayer from so many, I still struggled. I had one stressful situation after the next hit me in the weeks leading up to Genevieve’s birth. Ongoing issues with my teenager, tummy troubles with my youngest, drama with my midwives (which ended up working out better than I could have imagined). It was impossible to come to a place of peace before this baby was born, but I did my best! I wanted a quick, easy delivery in my home with my big kids close by, possibly even present for the birth if they wanted to be. I wanted mini...